Having said that, your tip to be careful not to overlook profiles without a picture is a terrific one. No need to rush through, take some time and read some profiles. Sounds like some might have passed your winning ticket!

Did some men not contact me or respond because my profile lacked a photo? I’m sure of it. Do I regret it? Not at all! I ended up with a man who was truly interested in me as a person, who was pleasantly surprised when I sent him my pic, and who is madly in love with me. I adore that man and am honored to now be his wife!

During that time I found there were a few things that were important to keep in mind.

1.) As you said, set up meetings quickly. Spending weeks on emails and calls just makes folks drift. Also, just because you can chat a lot on the phone does not mean you will even remotely get along in person.

2.) I disagree about coffee. That sets things up for what I now call “The Interview”. Either folks show up with their “list” of things that they want to find out, or on the other end of things, the lack of external stimuli causes quiet moments. Instead, make plans to go to a public event. A trade show, or a street fair are great, something that lets you walk and talk, and allows external influences to take your conversation to places you might not have expected.

3.) First date? Limit the length of time, maybe an hour or two, but set the duration in advance, and both agree to it. This way, if feelings are not mutual, there is a graceful “out”.

4.) Have some kind of food on the date. How someone eats, be it a hotdog, or a T-bone, speaks volumes.

5.) Make certain that your baggage is closed, and hers too. Way too many people are just too scared to be alone, and concequently they jump on the first opportunity that comes along. Making matters worse, they still have not figured out most of the issues with the past. There is no harm in a “practice girlfriend”, that lets you feel your way around out there, but make certain to keep it light. Take the time to make certain that you have the time to date, and the same with her. If the ex is still hanging around more than just for the kids, you might want to wait.

6.) Remember if you were married for 10 or 15 or 20 years, a lot has changed. Get used to it.

7.) Do your homework! Look at VH1 “Tough Love” Yes its a train wreck reality show, but you are going to meet women just like those on the show. Learn how to identify them, and which ones are “undateable”

Lastly, have fun. It took me 10 full years to meet the right person online (I met lots of great but not for me people, and some not so great, as well as several offline relationships over those years), but in the end, my sweetie and I have now been together since 2007 and this one had the right stuff from the moment we laid eyes on each other!

http://advice.eharmony.com/article/an-eharmony-success-couple-blog-the-filley-familys-busy-summer.html

Who would have thought lack of listening skills would carry over online! LOL

So that is why the included articles in all those “special interest” magazines.

They liked the photos and fired off an email. Us women are “slugs” also. If we don’t like what we see in the photo more than likely we will move on. But, if we do like what we see in the photo we will then read the profile and respond based on info in his profile. The majority of us anyway.

If I’m going to meet someone for coffee I want to know he likes not only my looks but who I am. Wish I had a dollar for every email I got from a guy whose only concern was how I looked. Could buy myself a new pair of shoes!
.-= Cathy´s last blog ..Fourth of July Recipe =-.